The Truth About Man

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One day in the GArden of Eden, Eve calls out to God. “Lord, I have a problem!” “Whats’ the problem, Eve?” “Lord, I know you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals and that hilarious comedic snake, but I’m just not happy.” “Why is that, Eve” came the reply from the above. “Lord, I am lonely, and I’m sick to death of apples.” “Well Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you.” “What’s a man, Lord?”

“This man will be a flawed creature, with many bad traits. He’ll lie, cheat, and be vainglorious; all in all, he’ll give you a hard time. But… he’ll be bigger, faster, and will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly when he’s aroused, but since you’ve been complaining, I’ll create him in such a way that he will satisfy your physical needs.” He will be witless and will revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a ball about.

“He wont’ be too smart, so he’ll also need your advice to think properly.”

“Sounds great.” says, Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow. What’s the catch, Lord?” “Well, you can have him on one condition.” “What’s that, Lord?” “As I said, he’ll be proud, arrogant, and self-adminiring… So you’ll have to let him believe that I made him first. But remember, it’s our little secret… You know, woman to woman.”

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